Life And Wondering Why

Sometimes I wonder why people always leave.

Why did Rich leave? Was I not pretty enough? Thin enough? Kind enough? Or was it him?

Why did Dad get Alzheimer’s? Why did his mind leave so long before his hugs?

Why couldn’t the doctors figure out what was making Mom sick? Why did she have to die so soon?

Why did my girls have to attend college hours away? Why didn’t they ever move back home?

(Apparently, this is my fault. I raised them to be independent thinkers and doers. To have the courage to do things even though they may be frightening. To never be afraid to get their own catsup.)

Why, then, did they have to follow their dreams and move farther West? Or follow their love and move farther North?

Why does the family next door, the brother on whom I’ve leaned for twenty years – why is he leaving now? Why is family scattered over the U.S. and why is he going the furthest from me?

Who will I call when the water is leaking? Who will I ask for advice about buying a car? (I hope I don’t have to do that for a long, long time.) My house is falling apart and who will help me? Who can I run to for a hug when sadness envelopes me?

I don’t have the answers to these questions.

But, I do know that collectively, they have given me a deeper understanding of the precious promise given in Hebrews 13:5:

I will never leave you, nor will I ever forsake you.

So, I will be content with what I have.

 

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About Lynnette

A sinner saved by grace, adopted, and now a Child of the Living God. My greatest desire is to please my Heavenly Father in all that I say and do.
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2 Responses to Life And Wondering Why

  1. Elaine Lovell says:

    Lynette,
    I too have thought these thoughts.
    The enemy of our souls uses our doubts, despair, and, yes, even fear to box us in.
    God uses these challenges to us to see how much we love Him. Will we run to Him? Will we curl up in His living arms? Will we cry and tell Him our feelings and longings? Will we rest as we wait His answers to our tears?
    Oh, Lynette, I am finding (and I am not there yet) that when I listen to the quiet promoting of the Holy Spirit and I do what He gently asks, my mind quits racing and I find peace in my singleness, my distance from my children and I, most of all, gain a heart of thankfulness that God Himself is my satisfaction.
    I too run to God, as you doI love you, my dear friend. If you would like to call me, tell me and I will email my phone number to you.

  2. Chuck and Connie says:

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